I am Audnavi.

So there's this song that was played today on NPR. It was performed with a Jamaican accent and very catchy. The theme consisted of two notes as follows: same note same note same note lower note same note. And I swear the lyrics are "Hooter My Cooter." 

I have spent the afternoon coming up with other entertaining lyrics that would fit into that musical phrase. Such as, "Hot in the Potty." All of these things are very entertaining when sung with a Jamaican accent. I recommend.

I'm house-sitting this weekend for the O'Willard menagerie. Can't wait to see Bud!

Watched Wall-E last night. Did not cry. Everyone I've spoken to that has seen that was reduced to tears. I am not even sure at which point they were remotely enticed to cry. And where did all that dust come from?

Have decided I could pass for Puerto Rican. Which I will need to do in order to be cast as Usnavi. 

Yesterday I spent time in the Third Reich filing papers. Lots of grimaces of dread and deafening heel taps. Saw lots of files with names like "Blaise" and "Astor" and "Ronin von Bungerflaban."

My giant orange hippo is less than comfortable to lie upon. And I don't want to try the elephant because he looks too pristine and jolly as is and I don't want to crumple him.

Rehearsal cancelled last night.  CANCELLED. No explanation. Can hardly wait to find out why.

My phone is ringing. It is all the way across the apartment. But I guess I'll get it cause I'll catch hell from several people who may read this if they have further proof that I "purposefully ignore" my phone.

My cats are in love. You can tell because the smaller orange one (who may be a dog and chewed off his own tail) spends 20 hours of the day hell bent on gnawing on the other cats' under the tail parts. This is weird and results in outrage and terror on the part of the big gray cat who really has no excuse for being such a puss as he has been gifted with seven extra claws on his front feet and could no doubt wipe the quiche out of the smaller one. And then you will suddenly come upon them cradling each others' heads with their paws and licking each others' faces. Issues.

I must now prepare for my walk. On my walk I will wear all of my coats and hats. I like getting al bundled up for winter and then having Brett or my brother shove me around. This is fun because you can't really move your head or arms in that condition and are sort of like Violet Blueberry from Willy Wonka. 

I will also perform Act I of "In the Heights." Which I have now decided I sort of like. Like the soundtrack better than watching the show however. One is distracted from the lyrics at the show by all the ripply hamstrings thwacking around downstage.